it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize