dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
