Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
