I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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