There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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