She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
