Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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