you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
