If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
third nipple confirmed
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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