im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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