Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
