dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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