At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
