Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
