i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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