My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
