she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
