i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
