yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
