I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
you win again, gameday.
He passed out mid-signature
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
