I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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