Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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