Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
