oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
