so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Randomize
