I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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