is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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