You really coming over, don't trick.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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