Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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