No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
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