Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
