More tranny stories later!
she was so not down for the gang bang
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
