I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
