My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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