therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
