This is not my ceiling
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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