So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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