plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
