It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
