Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
