I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
