like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
