everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
