normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
