we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
