I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize