worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
