I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
