whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
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