oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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