I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
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