Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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